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Wedding Review: The mountains of Paphos

Friday 8 June 2012
On my way to the reception with the bride's baby
In case you didn't catch my earlier post, I'm going to 5 weddings this year. As most of them are little holidays, I've decided to review them all. And here is my first, the second wedding in the year, in Cyprus...

The bride and groom: My best friend's dad's girlfriend's daughter. What?

The bride wore: I actually describe all wedding dresses in the same way. You're not going to get anything better out of me than "White...ish...with like a bodice thing, went out at the bottom... you know, a wedding dress. God."

The guest wore: A $5 halterneck dress from San Francisco. This is the second wedding outing it got. What you see on my head is a milkmaid braid and a bold red lip. Go big or go home, that's what Lauren Conrad tells me to think.

The location: Paphos in Cyprus. The ceremony itself was in a tiny church just outside the town, and the reception was in a traditional little restaurant, Petradaki's, in the mountains. To get there, we all piled into an old style bus, which blasted Cypriot ballads as the driver honked at every single bloody car that went past. It also flew over several bumps, at which point the baby in the picture above was airborne.

Comedy highlight: Was actually at the post-wedding bbq, a few days later (which was also the bride's 30th birthday). The groom got spectacularly drunk, and decided he wanted to jump in the pool. The bride did most definitely not want him to do so, and was quite vocal about it. We heard the splash. "Who is that? Who just jumped in that pool?" the bride demanded. He emerged fully clothed, soaking wet and dripping in blood. Yes, he had smacked his head on the bottom of the pool, and was pumping blood in quite a spectacular manner.

Of course, head injuries aren't any reason to giggle. But... I mean... we couldn't help it. It really was rather amusing. He was fine, obviously, but a lot of people were really very angry with him. Me and my friend hid around the corner to hide the giggles.

Any tears? Well, there were rather a few at the bbq, let me tell you. Before the incident in the pool, a woman came up to us, rather inebriated. We hadn't spoken to her at all the whole day, and I had no idea who she was.

"I'm sorry... I've just been crying my eyes out. I was talking to this man, who told me that he was from Eastleigh. Well, my grandma was from Eastleigh and... and..." the tears started again. "It's just such a small world!"

I almost told her that I too was from Eastleigh, just to see if her head would explode. But I didn't dare.

Next up: Hampshire.


  1. You look extremely foxy in this photo. Even though you're holding a baby. Hmm. Maybe the baby suits you. People have them as accessories now right?

  2. I do! I wanted to crop the baby out of it, but the way he was positioned kind of pushed my boobs up, so I couldn't complain.

  3. I'm from Eastleigh! No, only joking! You should have tried it though, just to see the reaction :)

    1. You had me for a second! I honestly think she would have had a breakdown if I said that. She was already bawling!


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