Afternoon tea at the Norfolk Royale Hotel, BournemouthFriday, 12 October 2012
Here's a shocking fact about me, that may surprise you. I'm not actually that into cake. Or biscuits, scones, anything along those lines. I mean, I don't strongly dislike them. I like a good lemon drizzle cake, and the occasional cookie. I just don't like them enough to actively go mad for them. I figure I blitz through enough calories with chocolate and pastries, that it's not worth wasting more on foods I'm not mad about.
When you're faced with an epic spread like the one at the Norfolk Royale, it's pretty hard to resist diving in. Despite the fact that we'd just had an epic feed at Urban Reef, we made short work of the towers that came out to us.
There are three options for an afternoon tea - the classic traditional one, with little sandwiches and buns, the savoury one (which featured an anchovy pastry that was DIVINE) and a chocolate indulgence.
Oh, the chocolate indulgence. There was a rich dark chocolate and chili tart that was right up my alley. It was topped with a white chocolate raspberry that I would have married if I could.
Actually, I know exactly who I wanted to marry. The general manager, Simon, has a champagne fetish that closely rivals my own. The others on my trip, who were staying here rather than the Green House, had been showered in champagne since their arrival. For the two hours we sat in the drawing room, my glass was never less than half full.
What can I say? He got me.
An Afternoon Tea at the Norfolk Royale Hotel costs from £12.95 pp, or £19.75 with champagne, chocolate liqueur or a martini.